The Big Crash

My life has been on such a high for over ten months and last week I crashed. I crashed big time. Satan had sent a horrid dream. Although I physically had things to do during the week, I was feeling nothing and yet I was feeling so much. So much pain. I had isolated myself from normal activity in life and yet hurt so much when my friends brother was listed as critical. For the first time, my homework assignment didn't get done. I spent a long time in the shower just talking to God and overflowed the shower. There was no day. I went shopping and felt nothing. I helped with an event and felt nothing. I helped in the office and felt nothing. I became a robot.

Well, I am really glad that week is gone. After not being really challenged other than by a teacher, I was challenged all week long. I attended two church services, spent four hours visiting with my cousin as she helped me through my week, I went to lunch with some friends after church and I am ready to start over again. I will no longer brag about not having been challenged. It was a week of little things adding up, one after another after another and now my heart is so tender toward things, I just crashed.

I have handed my life over to God and I have realized how insignificant what I did was as I never gave him credit. I understand now that I have a lot to contribute but it will all be contributed for him. He humbled me and is giving me a new chance.
I can not hide from the real world but need his help in setting my direction.